I have a secret
I once carried demons
I have another secret
I loved their crushing weight
It helped me forget
late at night when I sat with my sadness
The weight crushed me till I forgot
Till I could only think about pain
He laughed so easily
That’s what I thought about at first
He took up so much space when he moved
like he was so light with happiness
He swung his arms and moved his hands when he spoke
I watched him intently
I kept my hands on the straps of my bag
I couldn’t move too much
The weight would bury me
I couldn’t laugh too loud
or smile too wide
It might disturb the demons
I guess I wanted his laughter
But what I wanted more was to hurt him
I felt lighter when my demons snapped at him
Him with his easy smile
It made me want to crush the heart on his sleeve
And because I was lighter when I could hurt him
It made me sadder
The demons got heavier at night
Because
Because I still liked to him smile I guess
So I set him free
The one with a heart on his sleeve
