In the dream
It was all of my favourite things
But only in the worst way
The clouds were my favourite shade of grey
Smoke grey from a burning bush
The kind of grey that should be suffocating
Yet, yet it’s so pure
But in the dream
In the dream there’s something different
I don’t get it at first
I strain to listen
And then
Then, it hits me
Nothing
I hear nothing
The world is eerily quiet
And all of a sudden
All of a sudden, the grey is too much
I can feel it scream
I can feel the grey on my skin
It coats the air around me
It’s only grey and nothing
So much nothing
I close my eyes tight and think hard
I think only about my favourite things
But not the clouds
I want to get away from the clouds
I think of rain
I think about watching the rain fall through the window
Peace
And all of a sudden, the clouds are gone
I’m at the window
I’m at the window watching the rain
It’s so calm I don’t remember why my heart is thudding so fast
But then it thuds faster
I clutch my chest
It is a familiar feeling
Fear
But I don’t know why
Why am I scared?
I love to watch the rain
I focus on the rain
I focus on the rain so the fear will go away
But then I feel it
The rain is trying to get in
It’s angry
The wrath of the rain prickles my skin
I back away from the window
Only then do I realize how dark it is
So dark I can feel the blackness behind me
It has life
But I must get away from the rain
It’s almost at the window
Slowly I back away
Till I stop
I feel it
Ice cold
At the back of my neck
So cold
It’s fingers are so cold
Drawing trails down my neck
And then
And then I realize I’m awake
I’m not dreaming no more